I was able to go out tonight, which was nice. :) I was dropping off a gift to a friend, and my mom had a few stores that she wanted to swing by real quick. The last place we went to, I noticed someone smoking as we pulled up. The first thing I thought was, "I wonder if I'll have to put my mask on?" Because I've been slowly working on being alright with being outside for short times without needing to wear my mask. (Oh: I don't have a problem with people who smoke, I promise. But I am allergic to nicotine, thus the thought about the mask.) Then I remembered an incident from quite a few months ago.
I had been out with a friend. We were walking home after meeting up at a local collage, and after I hadn't been able to get a hold of my mom for a ride home. I was panicking from all the car fumes on the busy road when she called. We told her we'd meet her at the top of a particular hill we were near. We started up the hill and about half-way up came close to a bus stop where someone was smoking.
We were still several feet away - too far for the smoke to have any effect on me yet when my friend blurted out loud enough for him to hear, "Oh great! That guy's smoking! Now you're gonna die!" And proceeded to laugh.
I got a really embarrassed forced-smile on my face and sighed, letting out an awkward attempt at a laugh. I mostly succeeded at looking embarrassed. I couldn't believe that she'd just done that! I could just imagine how offended this stranger must be, and was worried about if he'd say or do anything. He looked over at us and, instead of glaring or making a comment, he took several steps out into the road, since no cars usually passed down that hill. He looked back forward and went back to minding his own business. I made sure as we were passing him to comment to my friend just loud enough for him to hear (I hope), "I really hate having allergies." Just so that he would know that we weren't trying to be jerks, although that's how we probably came across. For which, I am sorry.
I still can't quite figure out what his expression meant. But I do remember how touched and thankful I was at how kind he chose to be. The smoke still effected me, but not as much as it could have since he'd stepped out into the road. :) I know that he could have easily shot a glare at us, and he could have said a snide remark as we walked by. But, I think he could see I was embarrassed. I wonder if that had been the reason for his response, or if he would have stepped out into the road regardless to be a bigger person?
Either way, I'm so thankful to this individual. It really shows a lot about someone's character to react with simple kindness when met with unkindness first. It's a certain strength, I think.
I wish that more people could be kind. I wish that my friend hadn't been so rude. But...I feel like I learned a little something from this experience. And even if I hadn't, it still impressed me.
Anyway, there's not much more. I just wanted to share this simple experience. :) And maybe...I would like to add on: The next time you're about to say something that you think is funny, pause and think on if it would be offensive. I think people offend through humor more often they realize, myself included at times, and without the intention to do so most of the time. And if you're offended by someone, maybe try to be a bigger person. You don't have to be kind to them to be bigger, you can just not respond to them. Sometimes when people react to offense it only escalates the situation, and that can break out into a fight or argument that may or may not have a lasting effect on someone.
I guess...I just wish the world were a kinder place than it is. You know? :)
Have a good one!
-Bryn
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