So, I started working (HOORAY!!) at a Hickory Farms kiosk. I LOVE it like crazy. <3 Part of my job is, of course, sampling. :) I took the opportunity one day to do some social experimenting after getting the swing of things.
Half of the time I would say, "Would you like a sample?", "Would you guys like a sample?", and "Would any of you like a sample?" to everyone.
The other half of the time I would instead say, "Would either of you like a sample?" to couples, "Would (any/either) of you ladies like a sample?" to women grouped 2 or more, "Would (any/either) of you gentlemen like a sample?" to men grouped 2 or more, "Would you like a sample, ma'am?" to women on their own, or "Would you and your children like a sample, ma'am?" for women with their children, and "Would you like a sample, sir?" to men on their own.
It may not sound like anything significant, but after that day of experimenting, my dialogue sticks as close to the second grouping as possible. :) Most of the time no one takes a sample, but it doesn't change the effects. Every time someone realized I was talking to them, their postures would unconsciously straighten, they always smile, and they almost always seem to glow a little bit. Elderly individuals will also sometimes nod approvingly, as saying "sir" and "ma'am" as a sign of respect was something their generation were still taught to value. :) There have been a few times that someone will look up at me after a second, seeming to realize I was talking to them. Then they will look at me questioningly, and the moment it registers, they just smile. It makes me so happy. :D There are some times where they say "no" to the sample, but will walk a little closer without thinking about it. Young teens will brighten up immediately, and that especially makes my day. It's hard at that age, and part of that is because it feels like no one takes you seriously and no one respects you, especially adults. So I guess for an adult to address them as an equal in that way makes them happy. :) A few times, someone will see me as they walk by and then when I use "sir", "ma'am", "ladies", or "gentlemen", it doesn't register that I'm talking to them. Once or twice they have been the only person in the area, too. I've noticed that these individuals dress a little more carelessly and slump over a little more than others do. It almost seems like if they do hear me, they must think I couldn't possibly be referring to them because they probably haven't been shown a lot of respect. And...that makes me sad. People need to be uplifted, not weighed down, by others. Unfortunately, that does not always happen.
Words have more power than we may realize. I mean, there are bound to be some of you who already knew this, but there also bound to be some of you who maybe have not given it much thought. I know I personally didn't give the power of words deep thought until recent years, and haven't taken it completely seriously until the last couple of months. :) This experiment, for me, was all of the proof I needed that words do make a difference. It got me thinking that...well, the world would be made better if we started using at least "sir" and "ma'am" in our day-to-day conversations.
Honestly, sometimes I chase people down (...or stalk them for a few aisles...) in a store to tell them that I love their hair or their outfit or something, and I always say "ma'am" or "sir" (usually the first for who I chase down. XD ) before giving the compliment. "Excuse me. Ma'am? I just have to tell you that I love your blouse, it's beautiful!" As soon as I say, "ma'am", they already start to brighten up. It really is a beautiful thing. I can't explain it, why just saying "ma'am" or "sir" makes a difference, and a noticeable one at that, but it does.
So, I have a challenge to issue to everyone who reads this post.
For at least one day, dear reader, address persons you interact with as "sir" or "ma'am". Even the ones you may not think should be called that just because of what they are wearing. Everyone deserves to be respected...and, well, everyone needs it. One word of respect does make a difference. :) As you do this, observe their facial expressions, their postures, and their inner light - before and after. Also pay attention to how you feel. I promise you that you will feel a difference yourself too. :)
If you find the results of your own day's experiment to be satisfactory...maybe you will do it again the next day. ;)
All I know for sure is that I honestly believe the world would be a better place and people could love themselves and others a little more when shown respect or showing respect. Why? Because it feels good.
And...if we can show respect to others, then certainly we can show respect to ourselves. Certainly others will realize they can show respect to those around them, and show respect to themselves. Honestly, we need to be able to feel respect for ourselves...and sometimes we need someone to show respect to us before we can realize that we can do that for ourselves too. We can build each other up.
So let's you and I, dear reader, try and make the world a more positive place to live in by changing a few words in our vocabularies, one conversation at a time. :)
Happy Thanksgiving, dear reader, and have a fantastic day! Do your best to make at least one person, as well as yourself, smile today! :D
Love,
Bryn
Bryn
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